PART ONE
Last weekend, during the early hours of Sunday morning, I was made aware of unusual goings on in the neighbourhood where I live.
At around 1.15am, as a result of the unusual sounds that had woken me, I called the emergency services and within minutes my wife – who for reasons that will be obvious didn’t want to be named – had responded and was in the kitchen, witnessing a lone figure, clad completely in black, behaving in an uncharacteristic manner in the vicinity of the B-ones that he customarily enjoys as a biscuit-based canine-comestible prior to retiring to bed.
He didn’t appear to be fazed by her appearance, nor indeed by the countenance she bore, before which lesser mortals have been known to tremble. Instead, he returned her gaze, wagged his tail a little, and asked to be let out into the garden where, seemingly only interested in enjoying the full moon that may or may not have adversely affected his mind – it’s hard to tell with Labradors – he sat as motionless as he was silent.
After a few minutes, and despite the predictable cries of some demanding that he be sent back from whence he came – just outside Wiveliscombe as it happens – and others claiming they’d long known he’d been looking to do ‘big damage’ to the in-house food-preparation arena, Hector was summoned back inside the house, albeit with stringent conditions now being imposed to limit his freedom and prohibit him from ever attempting to breach the perimeter of the treat-containing cupboard again.
Enquiries are said to be continuing into what investigators are describing as a rapidly developing and highly complex situation. Meanwhile, local residents have been left with more questions than answers – not the least of which is why on earth they had left such a furry person of interest within sniffing distance of foodstuffs in the first place.
I guess there are some things that are simply not for us to know.
PART TWO
It’s now just four days since Hector made, as he is now claiming, his fair food request – one that, having been made at an unconventionally early hour, drew the attention of not only those sleeping upstairs but also the world’s media.
And speculation has continued as to the true significance of his actions with some, despite being far removed from the events themselves, stating that he was undoubtedly aided and abetted by hostile forces outside of his own home – possibly the Caledonian cat from number 37 whose owner, keeping that particular baudron firmly in the bag, is maintaining it had no involvement in the incident.
Social media has been awash with comment, with at least one going so far as to suggest that Hector should just be shot because, he says, ‘bullets are cheaper than trials’ – not that a trial is currently needed, given that the committing of a crime has not yet been established. But the aforementioned keyboard warrior would probably consider bullets cheaper than due process when it comes to legal matters.
Hector, meanwhile, is insisting that, far from being up to no good, he was simply making it known that he needed to go outside – he himself raising the alarm on account of his overdeveloped gastrocolic reflex having been triggered by mere thoughts of delectable delights of a biscuity nature that he at no point planned to indulge.
But still Mrs Goggins at number 49 is upset. Despite the reassurance that allowing Hector back into the house poses no risk to society, she, along with every other Don, Pete and Marco, is insisting that what is very obviously top secret should be made public knowledge thus making it far less likely that what shouldn’t, but may or may not have, never happens again.
Related posts:
To read ‘The Hector Chronicles’, click here
To read ‘Hector’s Year – 2025’, click here
