MY LEAST FAVOURITE THINGS

Fifty plus phone calls to make of a morning
CQC visits with too little warning
He who a very long problem list brings
These are a few of my least favourite things

Not enough bottles now for venesection
Those who are rude to the staff in reception
Just one appointment for several siblings
These are a few of my least favourite things

Visit requests at the end of the hard days
Ambulance shortages causing long delays
Slurs that at GPs the press daily slings
These are a few of my least favourite things

When the day’s done
And the blood’s spun
And I’m feeling glad
I simply remember my least favourite things
And then, very soon, I’m sad

Long waiting times to be seen in outpatients
Early requests for repeat stupefacients
Headlines inflating a GP’s earnings
These are a few of my least favourite things

Busy on call days with patients too numerous
MPs who don’t know their glutes from their humerus
Fitted Mirenas with no sign of strings
These are a few of my least favourite things

Lies about lazy GPs in the papers
Flatulent folk with their foul smelling vapours
Replacing PVC pessary rings
These are a few of my least favourite things

When the week ends
And I’m with friends
And I’m feeling high
I simply remember my least favourite things
And then I begin to cry

After Oscar Hammerstein II and Richard Rodgers

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For more song adaptations and woeful attempts at poetry, all with a GP flavour, please follow the links below:

To read ‘My Most Favourite Things’, click here

To read ‘Baggy White Coats’, click here

To read ‘If’, click here

To read ‘I am the very model of a General Practitioner’, click here

To read ‘A Hard Year For us All’, click here

To read ‘What a wonderful job this can be’, click here

To read ‘On Call Days and Mondays’, click here

To read ‘Yesteryear’, click here

To read ‘GPs – Do You Remember?’, click here

To read ‘Spare me a doctor’, click here

To read ‘I knew a Man’, click here

To read ‘Room Enough’, click here

To read ‘Old Hands’, click here

To read ‘I’ve got a little list’, click here

To read ‘Summertime’, click here

To read ‘GP Kicks’, click here

To read ‘How the grinch and Covid-19 stole General Practice’s Christmas’, click here

To read ‘’Twas the week bedore Christmas – 2020’, click here