‘There is a time to weep, and a time to laugh, a time to mourn, and a time to dance’ [Ecclesiastes 3:4]
It is probably fair to say that, over the years, I have written more about how life can sometimes be difficult and not infrequently sad, than I have of how life can, on occasions, be all that you want it to be and, therefore, often gloriously happy. And so, in order to redress the balance a little, I thought I’d write about a wedding that I went to recently.
Because it was a hugely happy day.
Now you might be expecting me to say something about how it was lovely to see a young man and a young woman coming together in marriage and pledging to love one another till death does them part. But I’m not. Because, whilst it was indeed lovely to see them standing at the front of the church and making their solemn vows, this isn’t what I want to focus on. Nor do I want to dwell too much on the moving address given by the preacher who, taking verses from Philippians Chapter 2* as his text, spoke of how a successful marriage comes about by humbling oneself, and, like Jesus, considering the needs of others above those of your own. And neither do I want to ramble on about the fine old hymns that were sung during which, sentimental old fool that I am, I found myself totally unable to hold back happy tears.
Instead I want to say something about what happened later, after the religious bit was over.
And no, I’m not going to wax lyrical about the food, delicious though it was. Nor the three amusing yet touching speeches given in traditional fashion by the father of the bride, the groom and the best man – all of whom stressed how important Christ is to both halves of the newly wedded and now exceedingly happy couple.
So, having put all that to one side, what I do want to tell you about is the dancing – and, in particular, that which took place after the cèilidh when the village hall where the reception was held was packed with people moving their bodies to the tracks of a suitably upbeat playlist, played via somebody’s mobile phone, through a highly effective set of speakers.
Now anyone who knows me will tell you that I don’t do D.I.S.C.O. dancing. This is for two reasons. Firstly I am far too self-conscious to venture out in even the most subdued lighting conditions, and secondly, even were I able to miraculously overcome my genetic disinclination to boogie, the stuff that I would endeavour to strut would not be considered by anyone to be even remotely funky. And so on such occasions, I prefer instead to stay safely on the sidelines. lurking in the shadows, forlornly staring into a half empty pint glass all the while musing how wonderful it would be if I too were somehow able to enjoy myself in the way that so many other people can.
But such moroseness was not what I felt on this occasion – on the contrary, I felt happy too. And this despite the fact that I have never in all my born days seen anyone dance as joyously as the bride and groom did that night. My abiding memory of the evening was the moment when, with her arms tightly clasped round her new husband’s neck, the bride bent her knees, lifted her legs off the ground and, with a smile as big as anyone could ever wish for, allowed herself to be swung around and around, every bit as energetically as the music that all the while played on.
It was a truly beautiful moment – one that got me thinking that perhaps the religious part of the wedding day hadn’t ended as the couple walked down the aisle and out into the churchyard, nine hours earlier.
Because, I thought, this was perhaps a moment of religious significance too.
And here’s why.
In the Bible, Jesus is sometimes referred to as a groom and the church is sometimes referred to as his bride. As such, one very important part of Christian marriage relates to how it is meant to reflect the relationship that exists between Christ and his church. Thus it is that when a Christian man and Christian woman come together in holy matrimony, they enter a partnership that is supposed to be life long**, one in which they are meant to be as inseparable as Christians are from the love of Christ.
That love relationship is then sealed; first by the giving of a ring, the external sign or an internal reality, much like baptism; and later by making love, the spiritual as well as physical act by which the newly wedded couple complete one another as the two become one flesh – an act which itself mirrors the union that Christians have with Christ and which is experienced, most profoundly perhaps, in the spiritual as well as physical act of receiving Holy Communion.
But the parallels don’t end there – they continue on throughout a couples married life. For just as Jesus laid down his life for the church, a Christian husband should be prepared to lay down his life for his wife and, just as the church should remain faithful to Christ, so too should a Christian wife remain faithful to her husband.
God’s love is both patient and kind, it neither envies or boasts, it is not arrogant or rude. It bears all things, hopes all things, and endures all things – even death on a cross. And not only does God’s love never fail, neither will it come to an end. And so, as recipients of such love, we find ourselves rejoicing with a joy that is even greater than that which I witnessed on the dance floor, a joy so overwhelming that words can’t be found to describe it, a joy that is, quite literally, inexpressible.
The Bible goes on to speak of how when Jesus returns, it will be like a wedding day, a day when Christ is fully united with his then perfect bride. And, we’re told, the ensuing party will be like that of a wedding supper, a reception where the exuberant celebrations will be more joyous than any that have ever taken place before.
That really will be a time to dance.
And this is what I was reminded of as I witnessed the joy that was so evident on the faces of, not only the bride and groom, but all who danced alongside them, And I was left looking forward to that great day, longing all the more to experience that greater joy which I believe will one day be mine.
But if my joy is to be complete, I need to cast aside my metaphorical pint glass and lose my self-consciousness. For it is only by being prepared to look a fool, that I will be able to look forward to the fullness of joy that will characterise that most happy of occasions. By which I mean that, in order to be confident of a place at those heavenly celebrations, I need to give up my foolish pride that likes to imagine that I’m somebody of note, somebody who might, perhaps, look good on the dance floor, and, recognising my weakness, cling instead to the one who saved me despite my falling woefully short of the person I am meant to be. That is, I need to cling to Jesus, the one who both clings to me and loves me, not because I am lovely, but because He himself is loving.
Only then, confident of the forgiveness won for me on the cross, can I be sure of being in God’s presence, a place where, as well as fullness of joy, there are, we are promised pleasures forevermore as well.
That for me is something worth looking forward to. I, for one, want to be in that number when the saints go dancing in. I long to be at that heavenly wedding reception – and I hope, one day, to see you there too.
And so I wonder, have you heard your invitation?
‘There is no God in heaven
There is no hell below
So says the great professor
of all there is to know
But I’ve had the invitation
that a sinner can’t refuse
It’s almost like salvation
It’s almost like the blues’
[Almost like the Blues – Leonard Cohen’]
*Philippians 2:1-13
‘So if there is any encouragement in Christ, any comfort from love, any participation in the Spirit, any affection and sympathy, complete my joy by being of the same mind, having the same love, being in full accord and of one mind. Do nothing from selfish ambition or conceit, but in humility count others more significant than yourselves. Let each of you look not only to his own interests, but also to the interests of others. Have this mind among yourselves, which is yours in Christ Jesus, who, though he was in the form of God, did not count equality with God a thing to be grasped, but emptied himself, by taking the form of a servant, being born in the likeness of men. And being found in human form, he humbled himself by becoming obedient to the point of death, even death on a cross. Therefore God has highly exalted him and bestowed on him the name that is above every name, so that at the name of Jesus every knee should bow, in heaven and on earth and under the earth, and every tongue confess that Jesus Christ is Lord, to the glory of God the Father.’
**I appreciate, of course, that this is not always the case. No marriage, including my own, is perfect, and some, sadly, do fail. But when they do, there is always grace available for those in need of forgiveness – and that is the case for me who is need of it as much as anyone. Even so, for the reasons given above, marriages are supposed to last a lifetime, they are meant to point us to Christ, and really are designed to be ‘happy ever after’.
Related posts:
To read ‘True Love’, click here
To read ‘Professor Ian Aird – A Time to Die’, click here
To read ‘Blaming it on the Boogie’, click here
To read ‘Reflections on the death of Leonard Cohen’, click here
To read ‘All’s Well that Ends Well’, click here
To read ‘The Resurrection – is it just rhubarb?’, click here
To read “Hope comes from believing the promises of God”, click here
To read ‘Faith and Doubt’, click here
To read ‘What becomes of the broken hearted? Sorrowful yet always rejoicing on Palm Sunday’, click here
To read ‘Why do bad things happen to good people? Sorrowful yet always rejoicing on Good Friday’, click here
To read ‘Was it not necessary that the Christ should suffer these things? Rejoicing, though temporarily sorrowful, on Easter Day’, click here.
To read ‘T.S. Eliot, Jesus and the Paradox of the Christian Life’, click here
To read “Why do bad things happen to good people – a tentative suggestion”, click here
To read “Suffering- A Personal View”, click here.
To read “Luther and the global pandemic – on becoming a theologian of the cross”, click here
To read ‘The Sacrifice of Isaac – Law or Gospel?’, click here
To read ‘Water from a Rock’, click here
To read ‘Real Power’, click here
To read ‘Foolishness – Law and Gospel’, click here
To read ‘The Promise Keeper’, click here
To read ‘The Rainbow’s End’, click here
To read, ‘But this I know’, click here
To read ‘I’ll miss this when I’m gone – extended theological version’, click here
To read ‘On being confronted by the law’, click here
To read ‘The “Already” and the “Not Yet”’, click here
To read ‘Rest Assured’, click here
Some musings 